February 14, 2016


Baru saja aku bilang aku tak tidur.
Aku tak tidur karena memang tak ingin mengantuk.
Rupanya ada yang tak menyukai keangkuhanku dalam terjaga.
Sehingga saat ini juga kedua mataku setengah mati beratnya untuk terbuka.

Adzan Subuh

Adzan subuh membangunkanku.
Padahal aku tak tidur.
Sentuhanmu membuat hatiku beku.
Padahal aku sudah hancur.

November 15, 2015

Déjà vu

Feeling the same you felt before even being you under the experience of a totally different occasion, an emotional replay coming from your state of rebound. Sensing the silent potential of what may happen if catalysed, the hype about it that's scary even for someone like you, who've felt it all already, you think. Should I let myself feel it again? The notion of such feelings, you have it, but would someone submit to a repeated ache that reverberates throughout the same pure hollowness that e sprouted once as the memories arose from you and shone the common darkness upon you, the one you got ultimately used to. Your life for a while, a long bittersweet period of self placidness.
Coming to a recovery releases the mind for what's out there by murdering the heart's natural tendencies, the hot unconditionality molten and glued to the borders of this ethereal piece which is rememberance, a badge you won from showing yourself capable of being selfless to a level high enough it's barely sane, to a point it creeps onto the clouds of non-sense. Smiling, for you love how love enriched you and still does everyday you picture the eyes of what's gone for good. I fell it and I see my eyes overflow with love intended to be given back to someone else if I'm a good enough person now and presuming she thought me the raw sufficient on humanity, colored my insides with a damp vividness that's bluer than the true sky whenever the sun irradiates my core the right way. Her reminiscent remains I make sure to save as I still keep needing them every time I happily gaze the blue ceiling that is still not as blue as me and the eyes who've turned me into such a beautiful colour.
Being a voyeur of life happens to everyone who was lucky enough to stand in front of someone, close enough to tell themselves that this they are seeing right now, it's all they need to know. Anyone who's stood somewhere, his tongue out to taste the calcining drops of the ashen and distant sight of the love you longed for, only to notice its aroma is null, insipid as always but still an existant entity, and you rejoice in finding reason in eating these spoiled pieces of what should have been merely meaningless memories.
Really! Am I the only one who struggled to devour them?

November 10, 2015

Kebetulan Itu Tidak Ada

1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
4. Have fun.


1. Someone says 'Are You Okay' you say? 
 More Than Words - Extreme
Well, my 'okay' is MOOORE THAN WORDS.

2. How would you describe yourself? 
Dancing Queen - ABBA
Basically this song is fits me perfectly. "Young and sweet... only seventeen..."

3. What do you like in a guy/girl? 
 Better Than Me, Better Than Love - A Thorn For Every Heart
He must better than me, better than love, and got a taste of my dreams.

4. How do you feel today?
Sway - Bic Runga
I fall into an ocean of you.

5. What is your life's purpose? 
Crossing Our Fingers For Summer - Cinematic Sunrise
As I follow the skyline, a familiar melody takes my breath away.
In time, the lights and the street signs show me, I know I'm where I belong.

6. What's your motto? 
Hikari - Utada Hikaru
 (I'll stop doing things that have no meaning, like thinking about the future.)

7. What do your friends think of you? 
Goodnight and Go - Imogen Heap
Say goodnight and go. (Basically they just want me to leave em asap lol)

8. What do your parents think of you? 
Kenakalan Remaja di Era Informatika - Efek Rumah Kaca

9. What do you think about very often? 
The End of The World - Skeeter Davis
Dont they know it's the end of the world?

10. What is 2+2? 
Stay High - Tove Lo
Gotta stay high all the time to think what 2+2 is...

11. What do you think of your best friend? 
Rather Be - Clean Bandit
There's no place i'd rather be~

12. What is your life story? 
The Way We Talk - The Maine

13. What do you want to be when you grow up?
The Adventure - Angels and Airwaves
Sounds pretty good to me.

14. What do you think when you see the person you like? 
Under The Sea - A Teens
I'm drowning.

15. What will you dance to at your wedding? 
You Told Me You Loved Me - Cinematic Sunrise
"...and someday i'll stay home and miss you more than you'll ever know."

16. What song will played at your funeral? 
You're Beautiful - James Blunt
I saw your face in a crowded place.

17. What is your hobby/interest? 
Sugar Sugar - Archies

18. What is your biggest fear?
Telephone - Lady Gaga ft Beyonce
Y'know, telephone can ruin everything.

19. What is your biggest secret? 
Something 'bout Love - David Archuleta
It is...

20. What do you want right now?
When We First Met - Hellogoodbye

21. What do you think of your friends?
Here In Your Arms - Hellogoodbye
Hugs are the best medicine~

22. What will you post this as? 
Kebetulan Itu Tidak Ada

August 26, 2015

Is It It?

Is it willingness to love or fear of solitude?

Is it an honest laugh or a hidden cry for help?

Is it light you see in her eyes or a desperate need to flee from the voidness of yours?

Is it real or a numbing remedy for your soul?

Is it you or the absence of who you wanted to be?